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Monday, August 20, 2007

A Monday Morning Funny-- Contest Continues

Men Are Just Happier People

(For women who love and write about men- for men who want to smile this morning)

What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a waterpark. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Graying hair adds attraction. Wedding dress~$5000. Tux rental~$100.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life.

Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier!

Random Drawing! Which one of these do you agree or disagree with most? Do you have another one to add to the list? Your post will enter you into my last weekly August Blog contest. You'll win a free autographed book from my list of available titles and Harlequin/Silhouette Coupons worth $5.00. Good luck!


catslady said...

I totally agree with all of them lol.

People don't think poorly of you when the house isn't cleaned and not in perfect condition. You never have to worry about people dropping in unexpectedly. You never have to worry about essentials such as toilet paper, clean clothes, washed dishes, milk, etc. not being available.

I could go on forever lol.

CherylStJ said...

>> Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. <<

This was my favorite!

I could add:
You can wake up to the doorbell and answer it without lookin in a mirror.

Charlene Sands said...

I love what you added. Can't tell you how many times I've missed the FED EX man, because I refused to go to the door looking like I'd just woken up!

Cheryl -- men really do have it easy. My husband shaved his head. He doesn't even have to do "hair" now. He showers and dresses and is good to go. Oh -- I forgot to say, he does have to shave now and then.
But at least the trash, has his name on it!

Minna said...

"You can be President."
That may be true in the States, but here in Finland our current president is a woman.

Maureen said...

I agree! It reminds me of when we have a barbeque and my husband is grilling while drinking and beer and having a cigar. I do everything else, even bringing the food out to him to grill. Then everyone thanks him.

Charlene Sands said...

We may very well have a female president soon. The public will decide next year. So I guess women CAN be presidents, like in Finland!

Maureen - That's a good one! The BBQ man flips a few steaks on the grill and gets the credit for the whole meal! Although, I must say, BBQ-ing is not my thing. I'm thankful my dh does it for me!

Anonymous said...

yes the shoes and underwear i beleive is true.

kim h

Cherie J said...

This is hilarious! I love this one especially:

The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

We travel alot by car to see our families in South Florida and Louisiana and this is always a problem.

I have another one. They don't worry about what to feed the kids or about buying the kids clothes.

Charlene Sands said...

Cherie J - this is so true. Dinner is always on the back of my mind, what to cook tonight. But I will admit, I haven't picked out clothes for my kids for a while (their choice) so I'm off the hook with that one!

Amy said...

These are so funny and so true. I never think about it out loud, you know. If I were out with my girl friends, I'll bet I could make the list a mile long...LOL As it is, you ladies have all done such a terrific job, all I can do is laugh!!!!!